There’s no better way to celebrate Caplin Rous’ 4th birthday than to start a new contest. Caplin loved contests, after all, he is the one who invented Rodent Jeopardy. This contest is even better because first prize is a teeshirt with our brand new capybara design on it.
If you’ve read my last couple of blog posts, you know that Stacy Winnick and Angela Dimeglio Mitchell spent a few days with me this week. The surprise is — although I may have mentioned it before — that they were designing a capybara teeshirt! Angela is a superb graphic artist and she did the artwork that you see in the image above. Isn’t it perfect? Melly is the one who came up with the text. Stacy was there to tell the other two how great they were. I was the model. Actually, I am the capybara on the left, Caplin is the one in the middle and Dobby is the one on the right. I love how Angela captured the cute way I wiggle my ears.
As I said, Melly came up with the text for the shirt: 3 capybaras walk into a bar…
What kind of text is that? It’s just the first part of a joke with no punch line! Smelly said that the punch line is just that they’re capybaras and it’s funny enough just to think of three capybaras going into a bar. I believe she is ridiculing me and my entire species. I think the joke needs a real punch line and that’s what this contest is about. To enter the contest, just post a comment with your punch line before Saturday, July 16th. Melly will collect them all and put them into the body of this post. Please keep it PG and PC.
Here’s an example punch line that Angela came up with:
Three capybaras walk into a bar and go to a back room with an undercover duck. The first capybara enters the room, approaches the duck, and claps his hands twice. The duck nods hands him the microfilm. The capybara turns and walks out. The second capybara enters the room, approaches the duck, and claps his hands twice. The duck tips his hat and hands him a coded message in a dark envelope. The capybara turns and walks out. The third capybara enters the room and stands quietly. The duck immediately says, “Arrest this imposter!” and the police come to handcuff the capybara and take him away. Considered a hero, the press and media quickly surround the duck. “Tell us,” they ask, “How did you know he was a fraud?” “Well,” says the undercover duck, “If you’re capy and you know it, clap your hands.”
RULES:
- Enter as many times as you like by writing your punch line in a comment to this post
- One entry per comment
- Entry must be received by Friday, July 15th, 11:59 pm Central Time
- Entry must be suitable for children
VOTING:
- Voting will be from Saturday, July 16th through Friday, July 22nd
- Anyone can vote
- Voters choose their three favorite punch lines using a poll on the right side bar of this blog
PRIZES:
- 1st place: A teeshirt featuring our new design
- 2nd place & 3rd place: a beautiful raku tile by Francine Rossi, examples are show below but each one is unique
If you’re interested in purchasing a teeshirt, make sure you respond to the poll on the right side bar.
The Winners are:
#14: Kerry Ann K.
#22: Jen S.
#27 Sara Beth
Congratulations to everyone who participated!
Thanks for sharing your creative minds with us.
Entries
- The first Capybara says to the others, “Next time maybe we shouldn’t look around for feathers when someone says, ‘Duck’” – Kate Copp
- One of them says “Wheres the free salad bar?” – Colleen Mac Nulty
- One says to the others, “Wow, you were right! This place DOES smell like our poop bowls!!” – Sara Beth
- So the first capy says to the bartender, “Do you have Timothy hay?”
and the bartender says “No, get out of here.” So the first capy leaves.
Then the second capy says to the bartender, “Do you have Timothy hay?”
and the bartender says “No, I don’t have Timothy hay. Get out of here or I’ll nail your foot to the floor.” And the second capy leaves.
So the third capy says to the bartender,
.
.
.
wait for it
.
.
.
.. GOT NAILS? – Mr. Breeze - And the horse bartender says “Why the short faces?” – Adam Fowler
- “ow” “ow” “ow” – Adam Fowler
- … after all having job interviews. The first one says he didnt get the job because he’s a rodent! The other two look at him in shock. “In this day and age? That’s horrible!” they tell him. “What was the job by the way?” they ask. The first rodent replies “Oh, it was a clinic for people suffering from murophobia”. (look it up! 🙂 ) – Adam Fowler
- We’re just here for the salad bar. – Mr. Breeze
- We heard that Thursday is three for the price of one – Mr. Breeze
- That’s ok, we aren’t tapirs, we’re capybaras. – Mr. Breeze
- No thanks, we’re vegetarians. – Mr. Breeze
- bartender: We don’t get many capybaras around here.
capy: And with these prices it’s no wonder! – Mr. Breeze - I’ll have the timothy hay and bring an anthill for the echidnas. – Mr. Breeze
- The first Capybara asks, “Where’s the dressing room?”
The bartender says, “You’re not supposed to be in here!”
The second Capybara asks, “Why not? We’re the entertainment!”
The bartender says, “Oh really? Where do you think you are?”
The third Capybara sings, “At the Capa, the Capa-Capybara! The hottest spot north of Havana… Here At the Capa, Capa-Capybara …” – Kerry Anne K. - Three capybaras walk into a bar, point to the salad and ask for step stools and someone with opposable thumbs – Colleen Mac Nulty
- Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender says “I told you yesterday We don’t serve wild animals in here”. One of the capybaras, extremely offended,
says “My name is Caplin Rous, a World wide celebrity…and this is Garibaldi Caplin Rous…an up and coming talent. The bartender says “Then who is the third one?”
He’s our attorney and we are suing you for defamation…… – Pam Moeck - Three capybaras walk into a bar noses and bonk their noses. All 3 shake their heads wondering where this nuisance bar came from. Not to be stopped by a silly little bar, they use their capy teeth, and chew their way through. – Alison
- Three capybaras walk into a bar. As they sit enjoying their beverages, someone shouts out “41!” and everyone laughs. They look at the bartender, puzzled. She says ‘Oh, that. Well, you see, most people here are regulars and we’ve all heard everyone’s jokes so to keep things simple we just numbered them and say the numbers”. Just then another patron yells out “26!” and everyone laughs.
The capys want to get in on this so the first, Caplin, yells out “17!” and everyone in the bar laughs.
Gari, the second capy, is jealous and yells out “6!” and the bar explodes into laughter, louder than the first.
The third capy, Dobby, is very jealous and yells out “14!”. Nothing. Stone silence.
Embarassed, Dobby looks at the bartender who shrugs and says, “I dunno. Some people just can’t tell a joke. – Fee Nix - Three capybaras walk into a bar, and Papua Piig says “Cavy, here they come!” – Kay Dudman
- Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the middle one says “Worried? I was beside myself!” – Kay Dudman
- Three capybaras walk into a bar, they are just starting their new jobs as capybaristas! – Kay Dudman
- 3 capybaras walk into a bar…and say to the bartender, “Don’t worry, we’re just here for Capy Hour.” – Jen S.
- Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the first one says, “it’s all right, it wasn’t a duck, it was Decoy!” – Kay Dudman
- Three Capybaras walk into a Texas bar.
They are all three talking about women! And, how not a one of them can understand them.
As one Capy rubs his “hands” around his cold beer bottle, a Magic Genie pops out.
The Genie have never seen such an animal as magnificent as a Capybara, is totally speechless. Finally in awe, the genie tells the Capy’s that they can each one have a wish.
So they all get together, and think about what they want to wish for.
1st Capy asks for a beautiful, warm pond of mud. Poof, there it is.
2cd Capy asks for a bridge from Texas to Argentina, so he can go home and visit his family.
The Genie tells him that is totally, completed, can’t be done impossible, and goes on to the 3rd Capy.
This Capy asked, not for a pond, nor a bridge, he only wanted ONE thing, and that was to be able to understand all women.
The Genie, looks at the third Capy, then to the second, and he asks the second Capy, if he wants a two lane or four lane bridge. – MissKitty - Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender stops them saying “Hey, this is a fancy place! You need a tie to get served here.” Since this bar served the best salad around, all three really wanted to get in. They head back out to search for some neckties, but after a long, hard search only come up with two neckties and some jumper cables. Deciding it’ll have to do, two of the capybaras put on the neckties and the third makes a nice bowtie with the jumper cables. They return to the bar where the first two capybaras get in no problem. The bartender says to the third. “That’s not a tie, I can’t let you in.” The third ‘bara responds. “Oh come on! I’ve been dying to try your salad all day and I’m tired from searching high and low for a tie. Just give me a break, will you?” Deciding that maybe he was too harsh on the poor capybara, the bartender relents. “Ok, you can come. But just don’t start anything.” – Ann
- Three capybaras walk into a bar and ask, “Where’s the pool?” The bartender shows them to the back of the bar, but the capybaras come back very soon in an indignant huff. “What’s the problem?” asks the bartender. “That pool is terrible,” reply the capyabaras. “It’s been drained and all the pool toys are as hard as billiard balls!” – Jennifer
- The bartender looks at the 3 capybaras wide eyed and exclaims, “Rodents of unusual size!! They DO exist!”
Gari looks at the bartender offended and states, “Of course we do! Otherwise I wouldn’t be named Garibaldi ROUS. Can we get 3 virgin frozen blueberry drinks with a stick?”
Bartender, “So… 3 fruit popsicles?”
Gari, Caplin, & Dobby in unison, “Yes please!” – Sara Beth - “…but I don’t think they exist.” – Kostia
- Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the bartender says to them: “Sorry, but I can’t let you inside if you don’t come with a leash and an adult person with you”. “Oh, but we come with a leash an adult person with us”, says the first capy, “only that we have let him tied up to a lampost, outside.” – Raquel
- The bartender looks at the 3 capybaras and says “We don’t serve rodents…this is a bar!”. To this they respond with “Moo”. – Andy G.
- Three capybaras walk into a bar…that day, everyone in the bar gave up drinking. Capybaras rule! – Pam Moeck
- Three capybaras walk into a bar with a guy. The guy asks the bartender “Hey Jim, if I can show you something amazing, can I have a free Coke? The bartender says “All right, Bob. What have you got?” So Bob puts three frogs on the bar and all of a sudden the frogs jump up and start into a Broadway medley. A man at the end of the bar watched the performance and said, “That’s amazing! I’ll give you $1,000 for the frogs.” Bob agreed and the other man happily left with the frogs. Jim the bartender nudged Bob, saying, “You know, you could have gotten more for these frogs.” Bob simply shrugged, “Frogs are easy to come by; the capybaras are ventriloquists.” – Ann
- THREE ´BARAS ENTER A BAR
LOOK HOW COOL AND SUAVE THEY ARE– Prachi Tripathi
- THREE ´BARAS ENTER A BAR
MAKING NEWS IN CORNERS FAR– Prachi Tripathi
- its not just a bar……….ITS A CAPYBAR
– Prachi Tripathi
- Three capybaras walk into a bar, just when it’s playing some blues guitar in the jukebox.
The three capys go to the counter:
-”One bourbon”, asks the first.
-”One scotch”, asks the second.
-”And one beer”, asks the third. – Raquel - Three capybaras walk into a bar.
The first asks the bartender:
“Please make me dry martini with black olive”.
The second one asks:
“For me, martini with some vermout and black olive”.
Bartender, visibly shaken, answers:
“I can’t believe my ears!”
The third capybara asks:
“You never heard capybaras speaking?”
“No, I never heard that someone orders martini with black olive!!” – Alex - Three capybaras walk into a bar. One turns to the others and says, “All right, which one of us will be the designated *diver* this time?” – Mike Mayer
- Three capybaras walk into a bar and ask the bartender: “Did you order the rodent exterminator?”
“Yes”, answers the burtender, “why?”
“Our client, the mouse from your cellar, called us and asked to take care of the guy as soon as he appears”. – Alex - 3 capybaras walk into a bar…a SALAD bar! – Melissa Horvath
- 3 capybaras walk into a bar…….the first capy takes a seat and say, “bartender, please fetch me some grass in a dirty glass” So, the bartender serves up the most green, most fresh grass that hands can pick….Then, the second Capy takes a seat. The bartender asks, “and, what can I get you?” The capy says, “yeah, I’ll take a large corn cob rolled over easy”. Next thing you know, here comes a delicious cob of the sweetest corn you ever have seen…Finally, last, but not least, the 3rd capybara, named Gari pulls up a chair, and bartender asks, “well and what can I get you?” Gari looks around and sees 3 really cute, talkative guinea pigs at the other end of the bar, sharing in great conversation, and a huge amazing vegetarian 10 course meal. Gari turns to the bartender ans says, “bring me the 3 little pigs over there with their treats” So, the bartender brings the 3 guinea pigs and their pot luck over. The first two capybaras scratch their fur and the first says to the second, “I thought the 3 little pigs story ended a lot differently than this?” The 2nd ones says, “I always disliked that ending anyways…now this ending is pure Capy nirvana!!!!” – Alex
- Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender says, “we don’t serve capys here.” Dobbye poops on the floor. Bartender says, “that’s why.” – Malkah
The first Capybara says to the others, “Next time maybe we shouldn’t look around for feathers when someone says, ‘Duck'”
Three Capys walk into a bar.
One of them says “Wheres the free salad bar?”
One says to the others, “Wow, you were right! This place DOES smell like our poop bowls!!”
So the first capy says to the bartender, “Do you have Timothy hay?”
and the bartender says “No, get out of here.” So the first capy leaves.
Then the second capy says to the bartender, “Do you have Timothy hay?”
and the bartender says “No, I don’t have Timothy hay. Get out of here or I’ll nail your foot to the floor.” And the second capy leaves.
So the third capy says to the bartender,
.
.
.
wait for it
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
. GOT NAILS?
(I totally told the previous joke wrong.)
We’re just here for the salad bar.
We heard that Thursday is three for the price of one.
That’s ok, we aren’t tapirs, we’re capybaras.
No thanks, we’re vegetarians.
bartender: We don’t get many capybaras around here.
capy: And with these prices it’s no wonder!
I’ll have the timothy hay and bring an anthill for the echidnas.
… And the horse bartender says “Why the short faces?”
“ow” “ow” “ow”
… after all having job interviews. The first one says he didnt get the job because he’s a rodent! The other two look at him in shock. “In this day and age? That’s horrible!” they tell him. “What was the job by the way?” they ask. The first rodent replies “Oh, it was a clinic for people suffering from murophobia”. (look it up! 🙂 )
The first Capybara asks, “Where’s the dressing room?”
The bartender says, “You’re not supposed to be in here!”
The second Capybara asks, “Why not? We’re the entertainment!”
The bartender says, “Oh really? Where do you think you are?”
The third Capybara sings, “At the Capa, the Capa-Capybara! The hottest spot north of Havana… Here At the Capa, Capa-Capybara …”
Please ignore/delete the first one… there are typos! I hit the wrong button…
Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender says “I told you yesterday We don’t serve wild animals in here”. One of the capybaras, extremely offended,
says “My name is Caplin Rous, a World wide celebrity…and this is Garibaldi Caplin Rous…an up an coming talent. The bartender says “Then who is the third one?”
He’s our attorney and we are suing you for defamation…
Three Capys walk into a bar
Point to the salad and ask for step stools and someone with opposable thumbs
Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender says “I told you yesterday We don’t serve wild animals in here”. One of the capybaras, extremely offended,
says “My name is Caplin Rous, a World wide celebrity…and this is Garibaldi Caplin Rous…an up and coming talent. The bartender says “Then who is the third one?”
He’s our attorney and we are suing you for defamation…
(Please delete first one…I fixed a typo.)
Three capybaras walk into a bar noses and bonk their noses. All 3 shake their heads wondering where this nuisance bar came from. Not to be stopped by a silly little bar, they use their capy teeth, and chew their way through.
Three capybaras walk into a bar. As they sit enjoying their beverages, someone shouts out “41!” and everyone laughs. They look at the bartender, puzzled. She says ‘Oh, that. Well, you see, most people here are regulars and we’ve all heard everyone’s jokes so to keep things simple we just numbered them and say the numbers”. Just then another patron yells out “26!” and everyone laughs.
The capys want to get in on this so the first, Caplin, yells out “17!” and everyone in the bar laughs.
Gari, the second capy, is jealous and yells out “6!” and the bar explodes into laughter, louder than the first.
The third capy, Dobby, is very jealous and yells out “14!”. Nothing. Stone silence.
Embarassed, Dobby looks at the bartender who shrugs and says, “I dunno. Some people just can’t tell a joke.”
Three capybaras walk into a bar, and Papua Piig says “Cavy, here they come!”
Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the middle one says “Worried? I was beside myself!”
Three capybaras walk into a bar, they are just starting their new jobs as capybaristas!
3 capybaras walk into a bar…and say to the bartender, “Don’t worry, we’re just here for Capy Hour.”
Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the first one says, “it’s all right, it wasn’t a duck, it was Decoy!”
Three Capybaras walk into a Texas bar.
They are all three talking about women!ANd, how not a one of them can understand them.
As one Capy rubs his “hands” around his cold beer bottle, a Magic Genie pops out.
The Genie have never seen such an animal as magnificent as a Capybara, is totally speechless. Finally in awe, the genie tells the Capy’s that they can each one have a wish.
So they all get together, and think about what they want to wish for.
1st Capy asks for a beautiful, warm pond of mud. Poof, there it is.
2cd Capy asks for a bridge from Texas to Argentina, so he can go home and visit his family.
The Genie tells him that is totally, completed, can’t be done impossible, and goes on to the 3rd Capy.
This Capy asked, not for a pond, nor a bridge, he only wanted ONE thing, and that was to be able to understand all women.
The Genie, looks at the third Capy, then to the second, and he asks the second Capy, if he wants a two lane or four lane bridge.
Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender stops them saying “Hey, this is a fancy place! You need a tie to get served here.” Since this bar served the best salad around, all three really wanted to get in. They head back out to search for some neckties, but after a long, hard search only come up with two neckties and some jumper cables. Deciding it’ll have to do, two of the capybaras put on the neckties and the third makes a nice bowtie with the jumper cables. They return to the bar where the first two capybaras get in no problem. The bartender says to the third. “That’s not a tie, I can’t let you in.” The third ‘bara responds. “Oh come on! I’ve been dying to try your salad all day and I’m tired from searching high and low for a tie. Just give me a break, will you?” Deciding that maybe he was too harsh on the poor capybara, the bartender relents. “Ok, you can come. But just don’t start anything.”
Three capybaras walk into a bar and ask, “Where’s the pool?” The bartender shows them to the back of the bar, but the capybaras come back very soon in an indignant huff. “What’s the problem?” asks the bartender. “That pool is terrible,” reply the capyabaras. “It’s been drained and all the pool toys are as hard as billiard balls!”
The bartender looks at the 3 capybaras wide eyed and exclaims, “Rodents of unusual size!! They DO exist!”
Gari looks at the bartender offended and states, “Of course we do! Otherwise I wouldn’t be named Garibaldi ROUS. Can we get 3 virgin frozen blueberry drinks with a stick?”
Bartender, “So… 3 fruit popsicles?”
Gari, Caplin, & Dobby in unison, “Yes please!”
“…but I don’t think they exist.”
you need some 2xx ‘s for the bigger folks the women s sizes
Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the bartender says to them: “Sorry, but I can’t let you inside if you don’t come with a leash and an adult person with you”. “Oh, but we come with a leash an adult person with us”, says the first capy, “only that we have let him tied up to a lampost, outside.”
The bartender looks at the 3 capybaras and says “We don’t serve rodents…this is a bar!”. To this they respond with “Moo”.
Three capybaras walk into a bar…that day, everyone in the bar gave up drinking. Capybaras rule!
Three capybaras walk into a bar with a guy. The guy asks the bartender “Hey Jim, if I can show you something amazing, can I have a free Coke? The bartender says “All right, Bob. What have you got?” So Bob puts three frogs on the bar and all of a sudden the frogs jump up and start into a Broadway medley. A man at the end of the bar watched the performance and said, “That’s amazing! I’ll give you $1,000 for the frogs.” Bob agreed and the other man happily left with the frogs. Jim the bartender nudged Bob, saying, “You know, you could have gotten more for these frogs.” Bob simply shrugged, “Frogs are easy to come by; the capybaras are ventriloquists.”
THREE ´BARAS ENTER A BAR
LOOK HOW COOL AND SUAVE THEY ARE 😉
OR
THREE ´BARAS ENTER A BAR
MAKING NEWS IN CORNERS FAR 😉
its not just a bar……….ITS A CAPYBAR 😉
Three capybaras walk into a bar, just when it’s playing some blues guitar in the jukebox.
The three capys go to the counter:
-“One bourbon”, asks the first.
-“One scotch”, asks the second.
-“And one beer”, asks the third.
Three capybaras walk into a bar and ask the bartender: “Did you order the rodent exterminator?”
“Yes”, answers the burtender, “why?”
“Our client called us from here and asked to take care of him as soon as he appears”.
3 Capybaras walk into a bar and order a pitcher of beer. The bartender looks at them and says “Oh no you don’t, last time you giant hamsters were in here you drank too much and trashed the place!”. “Well, how about if we only have one beer each this time”, asks the first. “Fine,” says the barkeep, “but one beer only!” The buddies start drinking their beer, and discussing their hard day of wallowing in the mud. Pretty soon, the first capy finishes his beer and quickly downs his friends beer, also. Sure enough, about 2 minutes later he slides off the bar stool and passes out on the floor. The bouncer walks over and disgustedly asks “Why the heck is that lyin’ on the floor?” To which the other capys reply “He’s not a lion, he’s a Capybara!”
Three capybaras walk into a bar.
The first asks the bartender:
“Please make me dry martini with black olive”.
The second one asks:
“For me, martini with some vermout and black olive”.
Bartender, visibly shaken, answers:
“I can’t believe my ears!”
The third capybara asks:
“You never heard capybaras speaking?”
“No, I never heard that someone orders martini with black olive!!”
Three capybaras walk into a bar. One turns to the others and says, “All right, which one of us will be the designated *diver* this time?”
3 capybaras walk into a bar…a SALAD bar!
Gari, you are cheating! You missed one entry of mine 🙂 So, let me edit it a little bit:
Three capybaras walk into a bar and ask the bartender: “Did you order the rodent exterminator?”
“Yes”, answers the burtender, “why?”
“Our client, the mouse from your cellar, called us and asked to take care of the guy as soon as he appears”.
3 capybaras walk into a bar…….the first capy takes a seat and say, “bartender, please fetch me some grass in a dirty glass” So, the bartender serves up the most green, most fresh grass that hands can pick….Then, the second Capy takes a seat. The bartender asks, “and, what can I get you?” The capy says, “yeah, I’ll take a large corn cob rolled over easy”. Next thing you know, here comes a delicious cob of the sweetest corn you ever have seen…Finally, last, but not least, the 3rd capybara, named Gari pulls up a chair, and bartender asks, “well and what can I get you?” Gari looks around and sees 3 really cute, talkative guinea pigs at the other end of the bar, sharing in great conversation, and a huge amazing vegetarian 10 course meal. Gari turns to the bartender ans says, “bring me the 3 little pigs over there with their treats” So, the bartender brings the 3 guinea pigs and their pot luck over. The first two capybaras scratch their fur and the first says to the second, “I thought the 3 little pigs story ended a lot differently than this?” The 2nd ones says, “I always disliked that ending anyways…now this ending is pure Capy nirvana!!!!”
Three capybaras walk into a bar. The bartender says, “we don’t serve capys here.” Dobbye poops on the floor. Bartender says, “that’s why.”
***
Sorry Dobbye! 🙂
Three capybaras walk into a bar.
There they say :
” Hey bartender,give each of us a big cigar !
The bartender got a shock, gave them three cigars,
and served them three “whiskeys on the rock”.
Then the bartender screamed to DOBBYE :”Oh,the one with the poop that was YOU!”
DOBBYE replied :”well ,if this happens again,-depends only on you !”
Offer us a capy-toilet,- and your bar stay clean.
We like:
~ Three capybaras walk into a bar, and the first one says, “it’s all right, it wasn’t a duck, it was Decoy!” ~
and
~ The bartender looks at the 3 capybaras and says “We don’t serve rodents…this is a bar!”. To this they respond with “Moo”.~
Please use the poll in the right side bar to vote.
Are these for the t-shirt? Some of them are awfully cute, but very long for a t-shirt.
They are answers to the question posed on the shirt but they will not be on the shirt. The shirt design assumes that you are going to come up with your own witty reply when people ask you about it.
Is the voting closed?? Did I win a tile??! :0